I was just reading Jessica's blog and on the 26th, there was a pretty cool entry. One at which I stare at from both sides of the plate. I read the Rosie O'Donnel dialogue form the movie along with her comments and I agree with it in principal. Vanity is an evil production played by both men and women. Being a big guy my whole life, I have seen the scenes played out in reverse. There were times that I was smaller, immediately after I got out of the service, then I got really big, then I lost alot of weight by working out in Pine Hall while the new Rec center was being built. I was squatting 405 pounds, benching 355, doing sets of flys with 70 and 80 pound dumbells. I was in shape and nearly getting "cut" at that time. Still had a little bit of a belly, 40 inch waist, though the smallest I got down to in the army was 37, and suddenly I had women talking to me for no reason what so ever. Never happened before other than the few relationships I'd had in the past that had come about by fate or whatever you may want to say determined it. Many of the new women that approached me were women that I had nothing in common with and couldn't hold a conversation, maybe it was just me. I ended my last relationship because when cuddling one night, I discovered 3 little sixes just inside her hairline behind her ear. But that's just it. People pass by possiblities every day without giving them a second glance. But it shouldn't be about "them". I think we have to simply learn to shine in our own skins. Work on what you can, but know that the core IS. I happen to agree that the women and men in the magazines and tv are plastic, interchangeable, and disposable, just like our society. They are products of it. For the most part, I quit watching tv along time ago because nothing had any relavance. Now I *really feel like an outsider. You know how tough it is to talk to people if you don't watch Survivor, Fear Factor, Friends, yada yada yada....? I would love to be able to find someone with the same interests as me, but I just don't think it's going to happen. As great as it was living in the middle of nowhere 3 months a year growing up (NW Ontario Canada), I was then missing out on alot of social interaction with friends and girls. It makes it easier for me to listen to the sound of my own skull perhaps, but it doesn't always stifle the din. Not to end the thought on a downer, but I resigned myself to the fact that I would die alone a long time ago.

Holy hannah. The new supergroup project by Dream Theater's drummer, Mike Portnoy, and fellow musicians, Kevin Matheos of Fates Warning, Kevin Moore, ex Dream Theater keyboardist and Chroma Key founder, is some kind of yummy. Chock full of crunchy goodness. Has a definate Pink Floyd feel to it in spots, and yet wow do they crunch. Gotta like E chord jams and minor scales. Makes me think of Schubert's 7th at times. I thought Spocks Beard would never leave my player. Foolish.